Ranting

Memphasis > We're Better Than This

October 20th, 2011

IS THIS OUR BEST SHOT? Evidently, after one of our state legislators falls off a barstool, another will take the stool – then take the wheel of his car. Loaded with a loaded gun. Ophelia meet Curry. If you take your group for an evening river cruise off Memphis, you can expect spectacular views of the bridges, skyline, and, quite possibly, a pole dance by a ...

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Memphasis > A Tasteful List

October 13th, 2011

A LIST YOU CAN SINK YOUR TEETH INTO. Seems like everybody has a list these days, so, in recognition of the 125th anniversary of The Daily News, here’s mine – 125 things that make Memphis easy to swallow – a sort of alphabetical soup to nuts of local flavor. Friends old and new, and a few long-gone, but I can taste them still. So chew on this: #164 ...

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Memphasis > Note To Self

October 6th, 2011

WE NEED ADVICE, FROM OURSELVES. About 25 years ago, I closed up my parents’ home at the end of their lives. Wandering through the empty house and the memories, I found myself in my old room, going through my desk drawers one more time. In the back of one, way back there, I found something I’d missed – a magnifying glass with a loose handle. Curious, I pulled ...

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Memphasis > Crime is down. Who knew?

September 29th, 2011

IGNORANCE ISN’T BLISS. IT’S FRIGHTENING. Tonight, within the first 30 seconds after going on the air, someone wearing an expression of deep concern – and plenty of hair product and makeup – is going to stare into the camera and dramatically read the following shocking revelation off the teleprompter. Today, crimes were committed in Memphis.

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Memphasis > Everyday Heroes

September 22nd, 2011

Be prepared. We need heroes every day. The assistant scoutmaster beside me was asking about procedure if something appeared to be broken. “Don’t do nothing,” answered the earnest, doubly negative instructor, “Transport.” “What if it’s a compound fracture?” “Don’t do nothing,” came the reply, ...

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